Why I Am No Longer Vegan
I kindly ask that you read this entire post before leaving any comments. While I am no longer vegan, the recipes on this blog will always be vegan friendly and cater to all types of eaters. Thank you for your continued support.
I have been putting this post off for a while because I’ve been really nervous about how it would be received. On one end, I was worried that friends and family who were skeptical of a plant based diet to begin with would have an “I told you so” mentality.
On the other hand, I worried that those who believe a plant-based diet is the only healthful way of eating would be critical and not understand my choice.
The bottom line is, I won’t ever be able to please everyone. This is the best decision for me and I am here to share my story in hopes it helps anyone who is in a similar position as I was.
Becoming vegan
I first went vegan in the Fall of 2015 and I felt really good. I had been pescatarian for a few months prior to that, and decided to cut out all dairy to help my hormones, digestion, and skin. Eventually, eggs were the only animal products remaining, so I figured why not try veganism?
Initially, it was a change I made for my health. However, it quickly became a deeply ethical stance after learning about factory farming and how animals end up on our plates. To me, veganism wasn’t a diet, it was a lifestyle, and I was in it for the long haul. For myself, the planet, and the animals.
My skin was the clearest it had ever been, my energy was high, my sleep and mood improved, my periods were easy, my running got better, the benefits were seemingly endless.
I was so excited about sharing my cruelty-free lifestyle with others, so eventually Eat With Clarity was born. I was passionate about sharing recipes with others and was excited to see the vegan movement grow.
I like to think I was a really responsible vegan. I always took my important supplements (vitamins D, B12, and even a multivitamin for good measure), didn’t try extreme fruit only diets, month long water fasts, or any of the other ridiculous trends I’d seen others doing.
Where things went wrong
About a year and a half ago (early 2018) I started to lose extreme amounts of hair in the shower. I’m not talking about a few extra hairs in my brush or on my pillow. I mean huge handfuls that would require me to clean the shower drain at least 3 times over the course of a 5-10 minute shower or else I would end up taking a bath instead.
I hate to sound superficial, but hair loss as a young woman is terrifying. It’s scary to feel like your body is going against you and scarier when you don’t know how to stop it or how bad it’s going to get.
I didn’t share any of this until now because it’s hard dealing with health issues and broadcasting them publicly. Everyone seems to have an opinion about what you should and shouldn’t do, so I kept this to myself for the most part.
Frankly, I don’t love sharing this now. But I think it’s important to include these details and share my story because what I went through is incredibly common. So, if you too are dealing with hair loss or other health issues, please know you aren’t alone.
I knew I needed a change
In addition to the hair loss, I lost my periods, had extreme fatigue yet horrible insomnia, shortness of breath, shin rashes, digestive discomfort and acne so severe I could hardly sleep.
No matter what I ate, right after dinner I was always bloated, gassy, and felt painfully inflamed. Most of the time after I ate I looked pregnant. I was in so much physical and emotional pain that I became a very unpleasant person to be around.
I played around with different foods, macronutrient breakdowns, and a host of other things while still maintaining a vegan diet, but nothing seemed to help.
No matter what food I cut out or added back, it stayed the same. My skin was terrible, my energy was low, and it was really hard finding foods that didn’t irritate my body.
I saw countless doctors and specialists. Eventually, after getting multiple rounds of blood work done, I learned I had severe hormonal imbalances, anemia, leaky gut, celiac disease and several nutrient deficiencies despite my diligent supplementation and varied plant-based diet.
My iron, B12, and vitamin D were extremely low, as well as iodine, selenium, zinc, copper, and a few others.
My body was unable to absorb iron and other nutrients in my food and supplements. In order to absorb nutrients, I needed to heal my gut. There were many foods I had to eliminate to heal my gut such as certain nuts, grains, and legumes. Continuing on a vegan diet without these foods would only lead to further deficiencies.
I contemplated making the change for months before I actually did, despite having very strong cravings for things like eggs and salmon.
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Veganism had become a huge part of my identity over the years and I didn’t want to let it go. I love animals and didn’t want to contribute to any suffering, but I also didn’t want my own health to suffer.
While I was not dealing with any life threatening conditions (though they very much so affected my ability to function on a daily basis), the symptoms I had served as very stark warning signs that something was wrong and needed my attention. If I continued to ignore them now, they would merely lead to more severe health issues down the road.
I tried EVERYTHING
In the past year and half I have seen more doctors and specialists than I care to count. I’ve seen conventional doctors, naturopathic doctors, homeopaths, chiropractors, acupuncturists, nutritionists, dietitians. You name it, I’ve tried it. I’ve had countless tests done, from hormone panels, to thyroid, iron, vitamin A, D, B12, iodine, and more.
I tried DOZENS of supplements (at one point I was taking upwards of 50 supplements a day just to feel normal). A lot of progress was made thanks to certain supplements, but not enough to get my health back to normal.
I love animals, I care about the planet, I don’t want to contribute to the suffering of any living being. But I couldn’t ignore the fact that my health was getting worse.
Your body speaks to you. Your job is to listen.
In January of this year, I decided to add collagen and bone broth into my diet to help my gut. I was scared to take the first sip of bone broth, maybe even a little grossed out, but as soon as I did, I could hear my body saying ahhh, yes, this is what I need. I drank it a few times a week, and added collagen to my golden milk lattes and slowly started to feel better.
Eventually, I added in eggs, wild caught fish, and organic chicken a few times a week. I soon noticed I no longer had the gassy and bloated feeling after I ate. Changes certainly did not occur overnight, but over time I started to feel much better, and my blood work reflected that.
To me, veganism was always about compassion. Compassion for others, the animals, the planet, but also for myself. Despite my morals screaming at me to keep eating a fully plant-based diet, my body was screaming for something different.
I couldn’t continue eating in a way that was not contributing to my health. Is eating an entirely plant-based diet a kinder way to treat the animals? Yes. But I needed to find a happy medium and treat myself kindly.
I wanted to be in a good place both physically and mentally before I shared this change. I have no ulterior or financial motive for changing my diet. The sole reason I changed my diet was because it was necessary for my health.
My experience adding in animal products
After many years and many thousands of dollars, I am very happy to report that my hair loss has stopped and is (slowly but surely!) growing back. My energy is higher, I’m able to sleep through the night, my digestion is better, my skin has cleared, I got my period back, and my blood work is much better.
My health issues didn’t vanish overnight and my dietary change hasn’t healed everything. Diet is only one piece of the health puzzle, albeit a very important one. This is my story and experience, and I do not want to give the vegan movement a bad rap.
I understand my decision may be confusing or upsetting. However, I want to be clear that a fully plant-based diet is a healthful and nutritious way of eating. It can work for a lot of people. However, I had to honor the fact that it was no longer working for me and probably won’t work for everyone. Humans are natural omnivores after all, and as much as I wanted it to, a fully plant based diet did not agree with my body. Veganism is inherently about compassion, but it’s important to remember to extend this compassion to ourself and fellow humans who simply cannot eat this way. Whether for health, financial or other reasons.
There is no one perfect human diet. We are all unique beings with different needs, ancestral backgrounds, and physical chemistries. I used to believe that some variation of veganism could work for everyone. But over the past year of dealing with my health issues, I realize this is not the case.
Being a compassionate, ethical, environmentally conscious person does not have to be black or white. Small changes go a long way and I think it’s important for us to do the best we can when we can. I do my best to be as environmentally and ethically conscious as possible while still maintaining my health.
When I heard stories of other people turning their backs on the vegan diet for health reasons, I would roll my eyes. I didn’t think there was any possible way animal products would promote health.
I always thought said person couldn’t have been in it for the right reasons. My sincere apologies to any ex-vegan I ever judged along the way. I can now understand where you are coming from.
What this means going forward
The recipes on this blog will continue to be 80% plant based and always gluten and dairy free. The recipes that are not vegan will have vegan options or alternatives whenever possible.
Certain recipes will contain eggs, fish, or chicken from time to time. However, I want this to be a place where ALL types of eaters are welcome, no questions or judgment.
My ultimate goal will always be to inspire others to bring MORE plants into the picture. For the sake of our health, the animals, and the planet, more plants is an excellent goal.
I feel amazing eating mostly plant based, but feel extra amazing with the addition of animal products. I hope you can respect my decision and I appreciate all of your continued love and support! ♡
Comments
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Very well stated and clarified from your experience. Thanks for caring and sharing your path to improved health. I have increased more plant-based foods into my life, but also listen to my body for whole person I am. Glad your health better. Keep taking care of yourself…..you know you!!🤗
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That’s awesome! I think adding more plants into your diet is always great, but listen to your body and do what’s best for you.
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Great article Claire. Thanks for sharing all of this. I have been much skeptical for the past years about nutrition. I am from Greece and one of the good things here is the Mediterranean way of eating. Maybe with less diary but with a quality meat or fish meal from time to time.
Hope you are fine and healthy.
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Dear Clair,
Wow, welldone!!
Sharing that couldn’t have been easy especially considering this is not only your your food choice, but your life style, and it weighs on many other aspects of your life.It’s really great that you’ve used your experience to shed light to some of the challenges faced when we opt for a vegan lifestyle and you’ve done it in such a positive and inspiring way!
I accidentally stumbled upon this whilst looking for your caramelized gluten free banana pancakes recipe but I’m so happy I did. You’re not alone on a journey of this sort I promise, though few will take the brave step in sharing such an experience.
Thankyou for using your platform in such an inspirational way!
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Thank you for your message! Many people are going through similar situations with their health, so I am happy to shed light on these issues in hope it can help others who are struggling.
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Thank you for your story me honesty. I too believe one diet doesn’t fit all. I do have a question. How does someone get parasites it there gut and how do you find out you ha e them?
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Hi Pam. You can read all about parasites and how I found out I had them/treated them here https://eatwithclarity.com/parasite-cleansing/
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Rock on Wellness Warrior! Your body is YOURS! It’s no-one’s business what you nourish your body with. I think it is amazing that you listened to your body and knew what it was telling you it needed. So many people don’t. Or can’t because they’ve eaten so poorly for so long. We are all biologically different. And that biology is constantly changing. Thank you for sharing your story. I’m so sorry you’ve had to struggle! And so happy you are feeling better and finding the right path to healing. Keep on rockin’ it!
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Exactly! What works for us at one point in our lives may not work forever and it’s so important to listen to what our bodies are asking for. Thank you for the love!
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Hi Claire,
I really appreciate you sharing your story with such openness and honesty. It’s something that hits us very deep when our bodies don’t respond to what we feel is the right thing. I find it helpful to hear I’m not alone in my own experience. There is a real moral, ethical and emotional dilemma that arises which in itself is a challenge.I went vegan 2014 after being veggie most my life, several months in I started with hair loss, fatigue, light headnedness and much later found I had iron, vitamin d and b12 deficiencies. Low iron stores (ferritin) has been the thing I’ve battled with for years (non-heme supplements just dont work for me).
I’ve been making organic chicken liver soup once a week which has finally helped get my ferritin up, along with heme iron supplements and I try to cut out gluten as much as possible.
So thank you again for sharing!
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Thank you so much for your message! I’m glad to hear this resonated with you, but so sorry you went through something similar. I hope you’ve been able to find what works for you and are doing better!
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I appreciate your story. Having only started being a vegan/ plant based a year and a half ago I still have the nagging in the back of my mind. To hear other people’s stories gives you signs to look for at least. And hey we do want we can where we can. If you think your perfect… you’re probably wrong😁
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A plant based diet really can be amazing, so don’t let my issues confuse you! There are definitely things you have to be cognizant of, so always listen to your body and do what’s best for you.
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As a vegan I’m sad you transitioned away from a full vegan lifestyle, but as a human who works in the healthcare industry I am infinitely saddened for your personal suffering. My heart truly bleeds for the physical and ultimately, the emotional trauma that goes with your journey. My love to you xoxo
On another note, my 2 cents if you will, there is strong evidence that fermented foods (eg kimchi, miso etc) contain significant values of vit b12 that can adequately sustain vegan diets. That said, my personal belief and that which I preach to anyone who will listen, is that ALL women, including omnis, will benefit from supplementing vit B (from multi b groups).
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Hi Karen, thank you! I have been taking a B-complex for quite a while now, which has been very beneficial. However, my issues go much deeper than needing certain vitamins/minerals, but I appreciate your thoughts.
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I had the exact same issues with veganism as you experienced. Added to my issues were that the extra carbs caused my blood sugar to rise. I have blood panels to prove it. No one is bashing the choice. I wish everyone would understand that veganism is not the end all be all option (cure) for everyone. Thank you for sharing.
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Thank you for sharing! Veganism is definitely not for everyone and I hope you are doing better now 🙂
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You don’t have to worries at all, being vegan means being compassionate about the whole nature, not only animals, and personally, all I want is that everyone feels healthy, happy, safe. And if you are now, I’m with you!🤗
I was just wondering if B12 had his part in your healthy problems. You know, many b12 supplements are made with cyanocobalamin, which undergoes a cyanide contamination used for its extraction. Even if cyanide it’s safe in that exposure, its repeated sublethal exposure can cause several healthy issues. Also, one of the side effects of cyanocobalamin is rash. My father had to stop taking b12 because it caused him several skin problems. Then we stopped taking too. It was 10 years ago circa. He completely healed and we never experienced problems at all and our b12 levels are perfect. It’s not easy to be healthy in a world full of chemistry. But spreading love is always the answer. Big hugs from Italy.-
I did have a B12 deficiency, but I was taking methylated B12 but still wasn’t absorbing it. Glad to hear you’re father is doing better!
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If you need supplements then the diet is flawed.
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That’s not entirely true, but thanks for the feedback!
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Thank you for sharing so honestly. I have just started a vegan diet (4 weeks now) and I wonder how it will affect my health – I hope in positive ways but I worry about long term changes and if I’m doing the right thing. I found your story really interesting and I will definitely keep checking in to see how you’re doing. I’m fairly new to your page but already love your recipes. Thanks again for sharing. Xx
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Hi Jen, thank you for your message! A vegan diet is an incredibly healthful way of eating, as long as you eat a balanced diet and supplement accordingly. A lot of people have long term success as a vegan, but it was no longer working for me. Thank you for the love and support!
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Well written and something every one of us needs to be reminded about. Each body is unique and needs different things at different times. We have to listen to our own bodies and like you did make adjustments when needed. So happy you are well. Thank you for sharing.
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Thank you, Gloria! It took me a while to get here but I’m so grateful things are finally getting better.
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No need to explain yourself to anyone. Your heart is true and your body is happy. Shine bright you sweet beautiful soul!
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Thank you Haley! I really appreciate that.
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So well stated. You clearly have given this a lot of thought and consideration. Your health is the most important part and clearly you have made this decision for excellent reasons. We all need to be open minded and not think in black and white terms. I am still vegan because it works for me but I would not be opposed to small amounts of fish or eggs if I felt I needed it. After all, humans are biologically omnivores so it makes sense that some people just don’t thrive on a 100 percent vegan diet.
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Exactly! I’m so glad veganism is working for you, but it just doesn’t work for everyone. Thank you for being open minded and for your support!
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The area where you went wrong was the iron. you don’t take the iron pills that the doctors give to you because they’re not the kind of iron that humans can digest. You need iron fluoride which is found in burdock root, sarapadilla. I took a natural liquid iron I took Floradix-vegan brand (Whole Foods) and it helped me
immensely.
You should’ve been to a naturopath because they would’ve helped you heal your gut while being vegan. it is 100% possible.-
Hi Abby, I never indicated which form of iron I took in this post, so I’m not sure why you jumped to that conclusion. It’s important to keep in mind that just because a certain supplement or way of eating/living worked for you, doesn’t mean it will work for someone else. It’s pretty clear to me you didn’t read this post because I very clearly stated that I went to a naturopath. Several of them actually. I’m sorry you are under the impression that one way of eating works for everyone, but unfortunately that is not the case. All the best.
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I don’t know you, but you sound like a very reasonable person. 🙂
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Thank you, Cyndi! I certainly like to think so 🙂
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Dear Claire,
It was with sympathy and pride that I just read your well written, in depth autobiography of the last few years. I admire your honesty and self-awareness, the passion you have for always being your best self. Nobody knows how to do that except YOU. Life is a series of trials and errors. All of us have our trials, but not everyone admits failure or the need to begin anew. You are a very brave young woman. I know from talking to your wonderful (and compassionate) parents that you have suffered, and are now moving forward with your life. Knowing you need to adapt to the lessons you have learned, ensures that these few years have been productive, albeit painful, chapters of your life. You are improving, have learned a great deal about nutrition and yourself that you did not know previously. With that knowledge you have the ability to not only help yourself ( most important!), but you can also be of help to others. I would never judge anyone based on their diet alone. Those who do are self-righteous and blind to others talents, skills, and other positive traits that others can contribute to this sad world. Keep up the great work ,and know that you are loved just the way you are – always!!! xo, aunt Martha-
Thank you Aunt Martha!! These past few years definitely haven’t been easy, but I finally feel like I’m on the other side of things and have seen so much improvement. Love to you, XO
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Thats IT! I would like to spread this message: “ There is no one perfect human diet. We are all unique beings with different needs, ancestral backgrounds, and physical chemistries. “
Just share your story every time you can. A lot of people are on the same path. Some are a bit behind some more advanced but that is exactly the next step after veganism – the balanced diet acording to personal needs. I would definatelly share your story!-
Thank you so much, Ben! A lot of people are struggling with the same issues, so I’m happy to share my story and hopefully help others along their health journey. I have so much more to share and I’m happy it has resonated with you so far.
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